Who to Invite To Your Wedding and How You Can Decide

who to invite to your weddingDo you invite college friends to your wedding? What about a friend’s date? Check out how you can decide who to invite to your wedding.

Wedding Invites

(photo by Paul Woolrich)

A good friend of mine is finally tying the knot and the very first thing she did was grab a piece of paper and start to jot down her guest list.

Then she was stuck. She listed more than a hundred guests and still has a lot more people in mind. She turned to me and asked “How did you manage to only have a hundred guests at your wedding?”

Indeed, one thing that many brides face before the wedding is how to finalize the guest list. If you invite a good friend, is her long time companion invited too?

Questions like this can be very basic but are also very important. For sure, you don’t want to put strain on any relationship just because of some invitation misunderstandings.

Here are some basic questions that you may also be looking for answers.

1. Who Should You Invite to Your Wedding?

Weddings are family affairs and thus, apart from your immediate family, friends and relatives close to you can be invited. Even if they are distant, as long as they are someone you consider very close and you think an important person to celebrate your wedding day, then go ahead invite them. Now, if you have a cousin you hate so much, no matter if they are a close relative, then don’t bother having them on your special day where they might ruin it. The bottom line is, you can invite whoever you think can make your wedding day special and happy. You don’t always have to follow wedding invite etiquette.

Deciding Who to Invite

  • Think About Your Wedding Budget
  • Decide on a Fixed Number of Guests
  • Start with Immediate Family
    and Close Friends

2. Do I Need to Invite the Companion and Dates of My Friends?

This can be a little tricky on your part but you can deal with it. Personally, I find it rude if someone brings their date to a wedding when they were the only ones invited. Unless of course, if the invitation states you can bring a guest. For brides, this is one thing that you can do. If you are close enough with your friend’s companion, then why not allow your friend to bring a guest? However, if you are trying to cut down on your cost or if you don’t like this person, then make your friend understand why you have to limit the number of guests.

3. Who Should I Invite From The Office?

If you have quite a large number of office-mates or there are a number of you in the department you are working at, you may just want to choose those who are close to you. You don’t have to invite the entire group. But even so, you have to avoid talking about the wedding and rubbing it in to those who were not invited. How about your boss? If you are close to your boss, why not? But if not, then why should you?

Sending invites? Read about the wedding RSVP timeline and guest replies for RSVP.

Sam at weddingwhoop.com - Wedding Planner


“Sometimes deciding who should be present at your wedding can be a hard task. Especially if your partner has different opinions.”

Find out what goes in a wedding invitation – essential reading.

4. Do I Invite My Parent’s Friends and Co-Workers?

wedding invites

(photo by Martin Allen)

I say, who is paying for the wedding? If your parents are paying for the wedding and sending out the invitation, then naturally, they would have a say in choosing who to invite – even if they insist on inviting a number of their friends.

5. How to Decide Who to Invite to Your Wedding?

If you are having a hard time finalizing a list of your invitees, try going over your list. My golden rule when it comes to deciding who to invite to your wedding and culling out your wedding guest list, is to check whether you want the person to be present on your wedding and be happy for you.

Need help deciding who to invite to your bridal shower or wedding shower?

So how can you decide who to invite? Decide on a fixed number of guests depending on your budget and shorten your list to fit that. Start with immediate family and close friends, then think about inviting others.

How about inviting children? Find out about weddings with or without children.

How did you decide your wedding list? Having a hard time deciding who to invite? Let us know, comment, tweet…

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4 Responses to Who to Invite To Your Wedding and How You Can Decide

  1. KaYE says:

    Is it rude not to invite people who invited you to their wedding? We only plan to do a small wedding and very limited number of guests.

  2. Sam says:

    If you only have a small wedding then you have a good reason to limit your guests to family and close friends. I’m sure those who invited you to their wedding would also understand such limitations.

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